And here we go – as promised a week ago, read the three simple tips that can help you next time when you encounter an occasion to negotiate.

1.Think: I. Say: We.

In her wonderful book „Lean in” Sheryl Sandberg describes how much it helps women when they apply this relationship-based approach. This means showing to the person on the other side of the negotiation table how much our negotiation goal is important to them from their perspective, how right the goal is, how legitimate it is when he/she looks at it with their eyes.
Paradoxically we create a situation then as if we negotiate for someone else – and we know that we are very good at that – and this person for whom we negotiate is e.g. our boss who we want to convince to give us a raise :)

2. Be authentic.

We women are extremely sensitive to smallest signs of a lack of integrity between who we believe we are and our role or roles that we perform in different spheres of lives. Sometimes it seems to me that this is the main reason why there are still so few of us on top positions – we are afraid we will need to pretend too much there.
So when you negotiate be true, be sincere to yourself. Say about yourself what you really think. That’s why it is so important that you think good about yourself, that you believe in, appreciate and properly estimate your value.

3. Prepare well!

Especially if you feel you may a bit underestimate yourself. Think about all your achievements, look at them objectively, the best will be if you write them down and then have a look at the list as if it is a history of achievements of someone else – maybe your male colleague. And if you notice you immediately start to remember some mistakes you have done, some failures – ask yourself if your male colleague would care so much about them too, if it was about his negotiations?

And set off to the meeting with your boss! Remember that when you negotiate for yourself you do this for all of us – first for us women because we will follow you one day and you are making our path easier, secondly for men – because the world where women are stronger than today and more present at levels where the most important decisions are taken, will be a better place for all of us!

All the best!

Read part 1